My kids are singing this song. And I’m singing it with them – we sort of get all high-pitchy and operatic when we get to the “when I cry” part. The song is from one of the SpongeBob episodes, and Squidward sings it.

When my tearducts get issue,
I can’t use just any tissue.
I need four-ply,
Four-Ply,
Four-Ply,
When I cry!
Hoo-ah!

I know, I know, its hilarious.
And yeah, if only.